Dear
--------,
How do I
say this? It isn’t always about how you write, but what you write.
I just
finished reading your story ------. The prose moved along smoothly, if a bit
slowly. There were two problems with this; first of all, even though you write
well, I don’t need all the detail. I don’t need a step-by-step explanation of
how to do such and so (too much made it tedious). Secondly, I guessed where you
were heading long before you got there.
I have
tell you, I was not happy with where I thought we were going. I could see it
coming, but I doggedly read on, giving you the benefit of the doubt. Sure
enough, by the time we got to the end, we went where I thought you were taking
me.
This letter isn’t about being predictable, although the story was that. It isn’t
about over attention to detail, despite how well that detail is done. It's about why I
didn’t find your protagonist sympathetic. There are some things in life that you
don’t deal with callously. Suicide is one of them.
What am I to think of
a character who refers to someone who is about to kill themselves as a ‘perp’?
What am I to think if she has no compassion whatsoever, that she’s only
concerned about performing her job well? I’ll tell you. I don’t
respect her. I’m not about to support such a character in prose, any more than
I would in real life. I’m sorry. I’m sure you’re a nice person and you thought
this was an interesting twist, but it isn’t for us. Maybe you can sell the story
elsewhere.
